Daddy cool!!

Dear friends, I want to dedicate this piece of writing to the four men I have in my life! Not a regular testimonial though but this one is a heartfelt stream of appreciation and thankfulness for these men without whom I would not have been what I am, today.

My father was the first person who taught me that as a girl child, I did not have to feel inferior to any boy. He planted his faith within me, guarded like a knight when I needed to be protected and let me fly when I spread my wings! I remember my mother advising my father, “Meye boley kotha…kichu taakaa jomaa kortei hobe, biyetey taakaa dite hobe!” This means, “She is a girl, we have to save enough for her dowry!” My father believed that one day I will be independent enough to fend for myself and in addition take a stand not to support dowry. “Je baaritey pon nebe, she baaritey amaar meye biye korbe na (my daughter will not marry into a household which demands dowry).” In his life, my father taught me the science of balancing the goods and odds of life and in his death, he rendered to me, the art of detachment. Now he is no more within his mortal body, but resting in eternal peace ‘somewhere up in star land, where the corner is cosy and blue’. He is as far as beyond the unending skies and as close as deep within my heart, like a lamp lit for the rest of my life!

My brother, whom I have always known as a little boy, is a hero now! Before I knew it, he grew up to be a very responsible, upright and a successful individual. And friends! Is he a woman’s man! I remember the lazy afternoons when his wife and I would wake up to find steaming hot grilled cutlets waiting for us, along with the chai! And by the way, he cooks better than me. My mom has trained both of us equally and he happens to have led the way in culinary skills, as also in all other skills, be it art, music, academics, whatever. To this quintessential gentleman, here is 'three cheers' and all good(est) wishes!

Since I am a foodie, most of my testimonials will bear references to my delightful experiences with food, lovingly dished out by these men! So friends, read on…

I am married to a Tamil household; to a family that carries many legacies of social changes that the previous generations have tried to bring about during a British ruled India. My father-in-law, reared in that milieu, is the epitome of social and gender equality. I have found no bias within him, neither social, nor gender bias. The law makes him a father-‘in-law’ but to me, he is like a doting mother and the dearest friend. Between him and his children (includes me too), there is no generation gap! Actually there is no generation gap between him and his grandchildren either! I am in total awe of this person who is a cheerful playmate to my child, a rock for me, emotionally and also in the mundane duties of life. He is a chat-room partner (not virtual please!) for his sons, nephews, daughters-in-law, neighbors (young and old)…list goes on…and arena varies from politics to craft to Urdu shayari to Naushad to Saigal to Dinkar..and on and on and on. Well, and how well we sing the old classic duets…provided you do not judge us by your ears, our duets are timeless!

And now, meet my hubby, the man I went ‘round and round’ the fire, taking vows for being partner throughout cheer and gloom. He reinforced what I had learnt from my father. He planted his belief within me and here we are, together in the journey called life, in a caravan called comradeship… And friends, no one cooks a better rasam than he does, either! And pakodas..and sambhar…and cookies…Wow! What a great cook he is and he is a better cook than me, a very stylish at that, too. My Mr Dependable, he is the earth for my roots as well as the wind beneath my wings. I leave it to my daughter to write a longer testimonial for her dad and save my further words about him for my personal diary! :) :)

And to all of them,

“Jeet hee lenge baazi hum-tum
Khel adhooraa chootey naa
Pyar ka bandhan, janmon kaa bandhan
Janmon kaa bandhan tootey na…
Pyar kaa bandhan tootey na”

Therefore, friends….let us join together for three cheers for the men in our lives, your, mine, everybody’s lives! There are not enough words for their testimony; but in the words of the generation which my child belongs to, these men, across the generations, are just TOO COOL!!!